2004: A Bitch of a Year

If you're like me, you've been reflecting on the pass year. Surely you're saying, "All in all, things went fine for me." I know I have.

Well, pry your Cheetos stained fingers away from the keyboard, take a step back and look at the bigger picture, 2004 sucked it hard. Anything that could go wrong did in governments around the world, especially that posioning bidness, what's up with that?

We still have this stupid war, though, it's technically not a war. Major combat had ended loooong time ago. Remember Bush? "Mission Accomplished." That dipshit.

All this leading up to probably the biggest know ecological disaster ever. Hell, many of the victims have been robbed of the dignity of a proper burial.

As far as I'm concerned 2004, you can hit the road. Get the hell outta my house 2004, 2005 is comin' to dinner. Unfortunately, 2005 already is tainted by 2004's stank, but I'm more then willing to welcome it with open yet cynical arms.

Don't blow it 2005. 2004 set the bar pretty low.

Hell Hath No Fury

Number One reason mmy head hurts:

A Classic 23 Skee-do!

It's that hazy-crazy resolution time of year again and I resolve to be more narrow-minded in 2005.

That's right, all of next year I'm thinking like a Republican, throwing all caution to the wind and blindly following 'W' to the bottom of whatever exciting and unfortunate stairway he decides to throw old lady America down. Meet you there you liberal, homosexual, pinko-commie, jew bastards, I've gots a ticket for the crazy train!

This is gonna rock! I already have my nicest stain resistent slacks on and you Democrat wierdos can eat it! WOOHOO! Dude, I can't wait.

Who needs a band-aid?

Rumsfeld made a "surprise" visit to Iraq yesterday... is this a mess yet? Tourniquet anyone?

we wanna know.

In a poll Taken by CNN, 90% of people considered the situation in Iraq "extremely important" That's all very well, as they should.

Terrorism was ranked as "extremely important" at 87%. I can see that. Cheers.

Health Care...
Economy...
Education.

87%...
86%...
86%.

Great...
Wonderful...
Right on, folks!

Unemployment, 77%. Alright, I guess
Budget Defecit, 77% That's still pretty up there.
Foreign Affairs, 74% Not too shabby.

Limitations on lawsuits, 52% Truthfully, that's not one I really care about anyway.
Laws to help racial minorities,47% Ouch. That's a kick in the drawers.
Abortion, didn't say what about it, I guess the importance of it.
41% Wait a minute here... this can't be right.

And finally,
Same sex Marriage... A WHOPPING 35%!

This seems to be totally different from the countries "mandate" W keeps talking about. When did abortion and same sex marriage stop being major concerns of the voting base that elected the Texas wunderkind? Where was religious and moral values?

My head hurts.



As an added bonus, can anyone figure out what I slipped in the post today with the double meaning relating to this article? First one to get it gets... I don't know yet.

Props, peeps.

Just wanted to give a quick shout out to the fellahs at fairweathermilitia.com. These guys comprise about four out of the six people who frequent this internet dumpheap. They have a live stream of roundtable discussions that luckily, do not involve Linkin Park or anything to do with the Baldwins (because they all suck.) I believe they are held on Monday evenings... I will have to check on that.

Check them out. I'm sure they'd appreciate it.


Mood: Angsty, suburban middle class white boy :(
Song: "In the end" - Linkin Park ;0

...

U.S. cancels Iraq's $4.1 billion debt
Four killed in attack on car in Mosul

My good Irish Catholic God. We are on the brink of 80 billion spent, reaching for 100 billion, and our boys keep dying.

Something about something.

I've gotten a bit antsy lately, so I thought I'd come up with a logo for The Larkins Way. This will be most versitile hopefully making it on to a shirt some day soon.

As a lark, if you dont like it, Email me a pic of what you think it should be. Just send it as a .jpg and keep the file size low.

I'll post the best ones if enough partake.

Word.

Boondogglin'

The mighty W missile defense shield failed today like an illiterate in a spelling bee. Good. It was a waste of money before 9/11 and it's an even bigger waste now... it helps that it doesn't work to justify that comment.

As something more for you to chew on, the test had been postponed in the past for various reasons, including weather and re-runs of "A Simple Life". Look, incoming missiles don't care what the weather is like and if that can be a problem for our magnificent infallible shield's missles, we should worry about rain on our parade.

Stupid W.

The Legend of Omeletteville

Our very own Omeletteville has been seen getting down on the message boards lately, so I thought this might be a good time to let everyone get to know one of the Larkins Way's most mysterious contributors.

I met the Big O some years ago at an Argentinean 'Rock-Paper-Scissors' prize fight. (The details of which I will spare you for reasons better left unsaid.) At the time he was a man of few words who was content spending his day drinking the rum he distilled in the back of a cheap-labor orphanage.

Only through his drunken ramblings and seemingly thought provoking night terrors did I really begin to understand the man Smokey & the Bandit refers to as "A marvelously unfortunate and handsome liability."

It was through these shards of shattered man that I started to piece together a story that I couldn't fully comprehend but never deny. It stands to reason he was bourn unto this world the son of a wealthy brine merchant and a promiscuous bow legged gypsy. He always referred to his youth as "An irreverent time in the Emerald Bosom."




From here did I make the startling discovery that he left his homeland at the age of 21 after engaging in clandestine operations with the IRA. Only now did I realize he was on the lamb from English authorities for crimes committed in the name of Mother Ireland, most notably his "The end of the rainbow leads to my pants" scam which the Queen Mother herself fell for.

It all made sense. His anti-Irish ruse, his fits of sobbing and incoherent singing whenever hearing 'Danny Boy' when drunk off of his backroom hooch. "He was and is trying to keep the heat off of himself!" I would think that every time he cursed the Lucky Charms Leprechaun... it was genius.

I for one will keep his secret, but will continue to celebrate his legacy any way I can.

The daddy's cure

Whiskey makes this administration seem alright. Is it really that bad? C'mon folks... this is the good fight, we gotta do this to prove a point. Support this freedom fight, sign up, get drafted. Democracy is clocked in!

I like whiskey. Alot.

Piss & vinegrette

This site has turned into a bit of a downer and it's taking me with it. Sure this administration is full of bumbling, no talent ass clowns, but to harp on it every day will kill a man. Let's face it, no one in Washington wants to take responibility for anything. Just pass the buck and come up with a worse way to try and dig us out. It will drive you mad to try and make sense of.

So tonight, the good.

The British have stopped a "Madrid style" attack. Unfortunately, due to sensitive security reasons this cannot really be elaborated upon, but, to know some good is coming of all of this is reassuring.

Students at Vermont's Bennington College are fighting for the right to run around bare ass naked. Apperently this has been somewhat of a practice sense the 60's which has been a part of the university's culture. Honestly, I don't know where any of you went to school, but to see goofballs running around as bare as a baby on a Baptist Sunday, seems liberating, erotic and amusingly disturbing.

Same sex marriage is a go in Canada. These bastards are always one step ahead of us. We should take a few lessons from our friends in the north. They're doing alot of things our elected officials say can't be done. Huzzah, Canada!

Butch Davis is no longer the coach of the Cleveland Browns... that probably only matters to me.

"U.S. warns of terrorist lasers"... This isn't happy go luck stuff, but read the article. It's wierd. Like George Lucas wrote it.

So, have a drink and relax. better now then never.

Tis the season?

Word on the street that the CIA chief is saying some pretty uninspiring things about the state of Iraq and honestly, that's about as believable as Elvis' death.

The "classified cable" noted that the situation in Iraq will deteriorate if they cannot build a substantial authority, economy or American Idol contestant. A top US commander there has yet to offer any objections. (Gen. George Casey) Mind you, this was released before it was edited with "Norton's Political Spin-Doctor vs.04"

What is most bothersome is that this was released during our nation's greatest spending orgy of the year. Bad new begets bad news it seems anymore, so why bother in the shadow that once was Christmas? The last thing we need now is another downer during the one time of year that is still held sacred as a moment that is innocent and pure... to everyone but capitalist coporations that is.

Sure this is pertinent info and we should keep a McGruff the Crime Dog eye on it, but lay it on us January 1st when the majority of people are more concerned about asperin and coffee. You could say the bomb is being dropped and you'll probably have someone saying, "Shut your hole, I'm sleeping one off!"

Remember, we have thousands of our own in a foriegn land with targets on thier backs this Christmas, and a thousand + more who won't see the holidays this year or ever again. Screw negetivity and get the friends and family together and celebrate those who cannot or are no longer here. Send your's overseas soome cookies or something. Unless you are gay, or liberal. None of you believe in God or this war.

Just kidding. Unless you are a conservative, then you probably took that seriously.

@$!@*$#!!

It's official. We are a nation of retards. It just so happens Ohio made Bush's victory there official today. DECEMBER FUCKING 6TH! What was the point? Was Kerry eligible for the coveted 'Presidential Mulligan'? I was blissfuly unaware that they were still keeping that one under wraps.

Oh, 3rd party members are gearing up to demand a recount anyway, because y'know, we still got a shot to prove there is dignity and honesty in the voting system. Guy, pack it in. Save it until 08 when we get another spin on this crazy merry-go-round.

P.S.

Bush says we need ONE TRILLION dollars for social securuty, supported of course, by government borrowing.
By the way:

"The White House had once hoped that budget surpluses, projected in 2000 at $5.6 trillion over 10 years, would fund the transition period. But those surpluses have vanished.

The federal budget deficit hit a record of $412 billion in the 2004 fiscal year that ended Sept. 30, and the Congressional Budget Office has projected $2.3 trillion in accumulated deficits over the next decade. "

That's right America, fuck you, good night.

You all ready for this?

1,500 more troops are off to Iraq. Plus we're talking big on Iran to the U.N. the same way we started with this whole mess with Iraq.

Very interesting.